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Words are powerful, they can make or break you. They can ruin or bring joy to someone’s day, they can fix or cause problems. Things written are words, things spoken are words, let’s talk words as it affects people. Some people do not know the power in the words they speak, some do and tend to misuse it. Not to go spiritual but the world was formed through words, the guide we have to live right are words. When you talk yourself down, that’s using words over yourself negatively. The problem is the more negative you speak the more you believe it, same thing goes for friends and nemesis. If you can’t go physical, you use words to hurt the person.

Words are like knives, they pierce through. We shouldn’t use words to cause pain but to uplift spirits. Not everyone has the strength to use negative words thrown at them as a driving force to do better. Most people drown in words and thoughts. As humans there are people we sometimes need encouragement or positive statements from. God has given us so many in His word. That no matter what we’re going through there’s always a scripture to help and the Holy Spirit is always around us to comfort us. But there are others we need the positivity from:

Our parents: I don’t believe in talking down a child. If I’m going through a bad time or I didn’t do so well in a subject or course, I should be bold enough and feel safe enough to tell my parents. And also be confident that they will know what to say to help me. Unfortunately though, that’s when parents will remember you didn’t do something right. This is where verbal abuse comes in.

I’ve had someone speak to me about her mother using negative words on her and how it made her feel unloved. Some parents especially in Africa believe using harsh words will help the child do better in other words a form of reverse psychology. I beg to differ because whatever is said to a child will stick in the mind of that child. Overtime if there is no form of help, the child begins to believe these words and then act them out. They also carry this school of thought to their homes and train their kids the same way. Later on parents begin to question where they went wrong. I am no counsellor but I know that words have a way of shaping a person. As parents or aspiring parents we should make up our minds to speak greatness over our children, in their presence and in your secret place.

Friends: as we get older we usually develop a way to use negative words to our benefit, a way to prove the nay Sayers wrong. For those that haven’t it’s important you choose your friends wisely. For me choosing friends is as important as choosing whom to marry. You can’t be friends with people who are quick to bring you down once you’ve failed at something or made a mistake.

Friends should want you to be better, of course there are fun banters among friends that require the use of insults. What I’m referring to is when things are real and serious. I don’t need my friend telling me I’m stupid or not smart. If they do then I need to check that friendship and re-evaluate what the friendship is built on. The way I can make my friend feel good about himself, his gift, her outfit, is the same way I want he or she to make me feel.

The other side to this is learning how to block out negative voices. There will always be someone who does not like you and is looking for a way to bring you down. If they can’t touch you the next best thing is to use words against you, in form of lies and insults just to make you feel less than who you are. Don’t let words of people who do not matter affect you or else you get sad and depressed over nothing. Life is really funny because you kind of need good people and bad ones around you. You need the insults as well as the encouragements. The best way to fight harsh words is to prove whoever said it wrong. It’s not for you to hate them but take whatever they say as a drive to suceed.

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